Tag Archives: Yoga

More kettlebell torture and some easy-ass yoga

30 Jan

OK, so here are my excuses for not attending a kettlebell class this week:

  • Kettlebells officially win as most persistent soreness. I wasn’t back to normal until Thursday! (I couldn’t sit down; it was more like dropping into a seated position.)
  • I was considering going to the Thursday class, but I didn’t want to be too sore for my Saturday personal training session.
  • …basically I was chicken shit.

On the plus side, I did do Favorite Video once this week. Not great…but not too shabby either. (Can you hear the justification?)

Anyway, I didn’t punk-out on the personal training session yesterday. I’m not sure, but I think the trainer was trying to punish me for not coming to a class. She had me start-out with a gazillion Turkish Get-Ups (and adding the kettlebell to the mix) and made me do a million squats, ass-to-the-ground style…soooooo looooooooooooooow.

When I left, my legs hurt so bad I could hardly walk to the car. In fact, I caught a girl gawking at my winced-face limping from a parked car.

The face I was making as I walked to the car...if I were a monkey

This time, it appears the aftermath consists of the same extreme leg soreness as last time plus a touch of lower back soreness. I just did this video:

…to try to remedy the situation.┬áIt was the easiest yoga ever and I feel exactly the same. I call false advertising shenanigans!

Anyway, the kettlebell instructor gave me “homework” to do squats and Turkish Get-Ups at home and also asked that I try to make it to a class this week. Taking bets now to see whether or not that’s going to happen.

Namaste bitches!

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Ffffffffffffff… (wince-face w/breathing in though my teeth)

20 Jan

Fffffffffffffffffff…aaaaaaaaaaah…I got something to say…and please don’t be mad!

I’ve been cheating on you. Behind your back I’ve been doing the Crunch: Super SlimDown video. (Eek – there, I said it!)

Fffffffff...yeah I kinda like this one

Sorry I didn’t tell you earlier, but I actually like doing it quite a bit and was worried that once you knew, it would have to come to an end.

This video is the whole Goldilocks-and-the-Three-Bears package:

  • Not too hard, not too easy
  • Not too short, not too long
  • Not too cheesy, but just-right cheesy

Really anything you could want in a workout video…but not too amusing to write about. (How can I bash something I luuuurve? Well, as much as one can lurve working-out, that be.)

But DON’T WORRY! I’ll continue to try new things – probably some that I despise and/or liquefy my muscles – like we arranged. In fact, this weekend I have my first personal training session in a kettle bell studio. If I can lift my fingers after that, be sure to watch for a most-likely amusing post.

Namaste bitches!

Basic Yoga Workout for Dummies

22 Aug

I’ve been at this “workout” business for over 2 months. Have you noticed that I’ve been avoiding everyone’s favorite: yoga? Seriously, everyone I know is all like, “I LOVE yoga! I carry my mat around everywhere so [people will notice me] I can do yoga at a moment’s notice! I like how it ‘centers’ me!” You know, that bullshit.

Each time I’ve tried yoga in the past, I felt like I was going to snap in half…yet amazingly bored despite the danger-level.

Well, I decided to stop putting-off the inevitable, so this week’s vid pic is Basic Yoga Workout for Dummies.

Contrary to my usual curmudgeon-ness about this workout crap, I may have actually liked this video…as much as one can like things other than wine, cheese and pajamas.

Plusses:

  • Is that Jennifer Aniston?
  • No dancing
  • Less than an hour
  • Easiest yoga moves that exist
  • And…no dancing

Minuses:

  • Some of the “for Dummies” icons/bits of info were obnoxious. Wait, you just told me to focus on breathing and on the pose, and now you’re interrupting me to tell me things like “yoga poses are named after animals.” Really?!?!?

Me, doing yoga (yes, that's pepperoni)

Get this: the one move that I couldn’t do was the relaxation pose at the end – the one where you lay on your back and breathe. Really. My lower back was all, like, “No relaxin’ for you!” I guess I’ll have to work up to laying on my back…tough stuff.

NAMASTE BITCHES!